“Don’t judge a book by its cover” – a very simple and common phrase yet will always be useful and full of wisdom.
Lately, I’ve been a victim of prejudgment and misjudgment. Last July 2010 I had a fight with my family, specifically with my mother and brother. My mother was so insensitive with my feelings. For a couple of months since my brother and I lived in the same house, I was always the one cleaning after his mess. I wash the dishes he uses, I clean the house and always pick up his clothes on the floor or any part of the house. And the worst is sometimes I have to wash his clothes if there’s no one available to do the laundry! And not just that, his girlfriend had been living with us for 3 months and sometimes I also get to do the laundry for her.
Well, I don’t have much complaint about his girlfriend because sometimes she would also help me clean the house. But she wasn’t always in since she’s working as a nurse. It’s like I’ve been working as a “house maid” with no salary. It’s so exhausting when you arrive from school you would get to see a huge mess and you know you’re the only one who’s gonna clean it! It’s okay if I get a bonus or my mother would give me extra allowance but my mother only gives me 50-100 pesos a day. When I go out, I always ride a jeepney but my brother would always ride in a taxi and he goes out everyday. Whenever my temper rises I would text my mother about my feelings that it’s so tiring to always clean after my brother’s mess but it seems like it’s nothing to her. I text her almost everyday but it seems like she doesn’t even bother to give me a reply.
One time, she called me and I grabbed the opportunity to talk to her about what was happening in the apartment. I was really angry when she told me that she was already sick of my text messages containing complaints about my brother. She told me that I was very selfish and had been only thinking about myself. She also told me that if I don’t want to clean the house, then just don’t. If she’s tired of my messages then why wouldn’t she give me a even a single reply. So for two days, I didn’t wash the dishes. My brother was really irritating. He didn’t even care if the dishes already got molds on it and the kitchen was very very dirty! When I saw that he really did not have intentions of washing the dishes, well after 2 days, I was still the one only who cleaned those mess.
I really hate my brother! I also hate my mother who loves my brother more than me when it is I who is doing good in school, who helps her with household chores and whom she could easily command to go somewhere to buy anything or to attend some important things.
One day, when my mother visited us, I was joking around her and told her to leave one of our helpers here in Cebu so that there would be someone who will clean the house and so I concentrate with my studies. And guess what? She became angry and told me that I’m asking a lot and I’m very selfish and always counting chores. In my mind I was thinking “THE HELL, AM I A HELPER HERE?!” I was deeply hurt but never spoke a word. So I went to my room and opened my laptop. While I was facebooking, I was annoyed by the noise outside my room. It was my mother talking and talking and talking about things and she was scolding both of us (my brother and I) .. blah blah blah. So i shouted, “Why are you scolding me? I’m the victim here!” So my brother was angry too and he asked why would I be a victim when I am the one who always gets the gadget that I want (because 2months ago I got my DSLR). So my mother was even more angry TO ME! She scolded my brother with a soft voice but she was scolding me like HER VOICE CANNOT BE HEARD IN THE OTHER SIDE OF THE MOUNTAIN!!! That was the time when I finally exploded and I became full of them.
I cried a lot and called my sister. I told her that I’m gonna pack my things and run away. She told me to relax but I really can’t take the unfairness in our household. My mother was even more angry when I told her how unfair she was and that I would run away. Even my cousins or other people who knew our family can even tell that she really is unfair in treating us siblings. She’s all about my brother. I even told her that she was lucky to have my sister as her daughter because she didn’t leave her even though long before she had always been wanting to go away. And that’s it! I ran away from my “family.” Or can I even call it a “family”?
I’ve been thankful to my friends who accepted me and let me sleep in their houses for a couple of days. Some of my friends would also meet me and talk to me about things that can make me smile. But some of them would misjudge me and though they wouldn’t tell me, I can see in their faces that they see me as a “rebellious brat”, someone who disrespects her parents, and impudent and a shameless person without knowing the story behind it. But there were also friends who accepted me wholly in their hearts though they haven’t known the reason why I had run away.
From the bottom of my heart, I sincerely thank the people who have not look down on me and did not judge me for what I did. I thank them for helping me get out of the misery and sadness that I feel inside. I thank them for filling my life with happiness and smiles. I finally realized that a friend in need is a friend indeed.
